By David Dent
At some point in the future influencers, or content creators as they now like to be referred, will be used in movies for reasons other than ridicule. Christopher Smith’s latest, his first feature since the luke warm nunsploiter Consecration in 2023, treats them with the disdain which a horror crowd would probably approve (even though the plethora of podcasts and YouTube moments created by that community suggest a popular phrase involving ‘people’ and ‘glass houses’).
Here a boatful of creators and camera hungry young souls, all buff bods in swimsuits talking over the top of each other excitedly, rock up on an island as the freebie guests of hotelier David (Andy Nyman in good moustache twiddling form). David is VP of Infinity Dream International and he’s looking to get some good media coverage of his latest beachside facility, courtesy of his guests. Despite his company’s eco credentials, there’s plans for further hotel expansion into the island.
Undercover reporter Clara (Rose Williams) is looking to run an expose on IDI’s less than ideal eco track record, while at the same time hanging out with her dad, retired actor Curtis (Tim McInnerney) with whom she’s become estranged, and who runs a shabbier hotel (and almost 24/7 bar) on the same piece of land.
Nothing is spared for the guests’ comfort, with the exception of the air conditioning, which is on the fritz because of a blockage (check the movie’s title). While David assures the party guests that none of the island’s flora and fauna are in any way dangerous, this is clearly a fib; and you could trust him about as far as you could throw him, for he’s determined to keep him operation going even after the indigenous arachnid population begin their revenge.
Yes you’ve guessed it, we’re back in Jaws territory, or more precisely Jaws ripoff Piranha (actually make that Alexander Aja’s 2010 re reboot Piranha 3D) but with more legs. Smith’s broad humour, sometimes a bit cloth eared (a comedy character nicknamed mongoose, whose mum shortens his name to ‘mong’ anyone?) generally plays well, and the CGI spiders are very effective; I’m not an arachnophobe, and even I got a bit wigged out. As mentioned, Nyman and McInnerney both steal the show here; they get the best lines, and effortlessly upstage most of the rather vapid younger cast. Perhaps that’s the point.
Bloody Flicks 